The day the BBC decided Putin murdered his mate

6 Mar, 2018 14:47 / Updated 7 years ago

Crying at the funeral of a friend is a sign you murdered them, according to a top journalist at the BBC. Well, only if you’re Russian, and your name is Vladimir Putin.

Shedding tears at the last goodbye, embracing said friend’s widow and showing emotion was a giveaway that there was blood on the Russian president’s hands, apparently.

An eagle-eyed reporter turned body language expert, psychologist and well, mind reader, has treated us all to his ramblings and taken us on his giant leap from tears for a loved one to 'mystery solved' in an article titled “The day Putin cried.”

The claims would be offensive and outlandish if they weren’t so utterly laughable. They were also made under the guise of serious reporting. The Russian elections are looming and the introduction pays tribute to that fact. That single, lone, fact. And then the article takes a bizarre twist – hopping back in time to February 24, 2000, and the funeral of Anatoly Sobchak.

Sobchak was a propeller behind Putin’s political career, after spotting potential in the former KGB agent. Sobchak was Mayor of St. Petersburg when he took Putin under his wing, making him his deputy. When Putin ran for president, Anatoly Sobchak died in a hotel room in Kaliningrad, at the age of 62.

BBC journalist Gabriel Gatehouse wrote: “The autopsy said it was cardiac arrest but can't find any trace of a heart attack. Sobchak's widow suspected foul play and had her own autopsy done.

“Her name is Lyudmila Narusova. I met her recently and asked her if she thought her husband had been murdered. She paused long enough to say ‘Yes’ 10 times over, and then replied: ‘I don't know’."

So, she also paused long enough to say no 10 times, but let’s put words in the mouth of a bereft widow. Narusova is not the only one whose missing actions and words are filled in like a bad crossword by the BBC. The president is also treated to retrospective ventriloquism by Gatehouse.

He wrote: “I went back and looked at the footage of the funeral. Putin really is distraught. His eyes are red, he seems to struggle to swallow as he embraces Lyudmila Narusova. Putin is not an actor. Nor is he prone to public displays of emotion. So, it's reasonable to assume that he is struggling with some genuine grief. Or is it something else. Guilt?”

Sobchak’s wife clearly dismisses the idea of Putin having a hand in her husband’s death in an interview with Gatehouse – cue the Russian bogeyman. “If Sobchak was murdered, was it by one of those factions who feared his mentor's hold over him?” Gatehouse writes.

“Maybe. And if so, did the old KGB officer realize his old friend died in the furtherance of Project Putin. It's only a suspicion, but I'm beginning to think so.”

Back in the realm of ‘almost news,’ Gatehouse details how Ksenia, Sobchak’s 36-year-old daughter is running against Putin. She disagrees with the government – obviously. Her views on many things are different. Kind of like Jeremy Corbyn disagreeing with Theresa May – accusing the government of being responsible for the deaths of poor people.

This is the BBC and this is Russia, however. Conclusion? Sobchak Junior is a mole planted to say bad things about Putin so he gets elected for a fourth term as president on 18 March… naturally.

Gatehouse writes: “Supporters of Alexei Navalny, the quote-unquote ‘real’ opposition candidate, who's been barred from standing, says she is a Kremlin stooge – an old family friend drafted in by Putin to lend the election an air of credibility.

"Certainly, she would not be running without the tacit permission of the authorities. That's how the Russian system works. “But the men in grey suits who run the Kremlin may be regretting their decision. Ksenia is touring TV studios naming corrupt cronies around Putin and calling the annexation of Crimea illegal. If, as she maintains, she is running not to win but to be heard, then she is certainly breaking some taboos.”

Gatehouse talks frequently of the “men in grey suits” and has a distorted image on his Twitter page, likely through overwhelming self-importance or paranoia over being a “target.” Either way, we reckon he should worry more about the men in white coats…

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